We all have to say goodbye.
Hi! So I know I said I would have a blog up in a couple of days from my last one, and it has almost been a month, but the reason for my absence is mainly because my grandpa passed away a couple of days after my last blog, which was right before Christmas. The truth is, whenever my friends had relatives who passed away, I never really understood what it felt like because I personally had never had a relative of mine pass away before. But I had been extremely close to my grandparents from my mom’s side my entire life, especially my grandpa and it really just struck me hard. Even three weeks after it’s happened, it seems surreal. It doesn’t really feel like he’s gone, it’s almost as if he’ll be there the next time I go to visit him again.
The thing is, my grandparents moved back to Hong Kong when I was a couple of years old and since they moved back they had come to visit once and we had gone to visit twice. And of course, flying across the world takes about 20+ hours so this didn’t happen very often. Well three years ago my grandpa had a stroke and was in bed for about a year. My mom went back to visit him and since I was still in school and everything I couldn’t, but the following year I did and he was up and walking again. A little less than two years ago though, he had another stroke and had been in bed since. By then, my grandparents had moved back to their hometown in China. We went again to visit him not know if his condition was stable or not. He had hurt his leg when he tripped, which caused the second stroke, and when he was being moved on a stretcher or wheelchair of some sort he got hurt even more. By then my grandpa was pretty much half paralyzed but still could somewhat move though it was very painful for him. His mind wasn’t quite clear and he couldn’t think very straight, but he still could recognize everybody and have some sort of a conversation with people.
A couple of months ago is when it got really bad. My dad went to visit family back in September and so of course, he visited my grandpa as well. It turns out my grandpa couldn’t recognize him anymore, or really anyone for that matter. That alone got to me, because I realized that if I ever saw him again, he wouldn’t be able to tell who I was. This hurt me a lot because I had basically grown up with him and I looked up to him for so many things. Then in November we got a call saying that he really wasn’t doing well and might pass at any time so my mom and I had plans to go back, but then they said he was stable again for now, and since I had a piano exam in January, we figured once I finished that we would go so that I didn’t have to leave right before my exam. Unfortunately, my grandpa didn’t make it and both my mom and I regret very much not going back in November, but in some way I guess God really planned things out for us because if we had gone in November, we probably wouldn’t have been able to go again in December for his funeral. I got the news at school right before we were going off for our Christmas Break and we left for China 3 days after and stayed for 10 days to help my grandpa finish up some stuff, help sort through everything, clean the house, and obviously attend the funeral. I’m not telling you all this for the sympathy and pity and in no way am I doing this for the attention, I just really wanted to be able to share the great life that was lost on December 18th, 2009, and although my grandpa lived a great life of 91 years, he will never be forgotten. Please also, keep him in your prayers, they would really mean a lot to both him and I.
I never knew any of my grandparents as they have died before I was born, but I do have one grandma left. I’m not that very close to her or anything, but I’m sure I’d be just as devastated.. 91 years is a long life, but sometimes it doesn’t seem long enough. Your right about the ‘plans’, maybe if you had gone then, you wouldnt have been able to go for the funeral as you said. It would probably be harder for you guys to cope with it if you never got to go to it, or get to say goodbye, though you still can on your own time. Its hard no matter what, and I know what you mean- I’ve had close friends and family members die, and it never seems like their gone forever.. It’s like they’ll be there when you go next time, and then it’s strange when you realize they won’t be…
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Yes I totally do get what you mean. We watch the shows that our friends watch most of the time. I don’t think many of my friends watch the bachelor.. but I still do, cause I just think it’s frikin’ hilarious.
I hate it when everyone is talking about a show and I have no idea what it’s about cause I’ve never seen it before so I’m just kinda standing there nodding and smiling awkwardly.
Don’t worry about rambling. I do it all the time.
Yeah it truly is a recipe for disaster to get to know someone on TV.. because usually people don’t act like their true selves on television.. so for all you know this guy who you’re “falling in love with” could be a completely different idiot when he’s off the television screen.
Major bitch fights ftw though.
Aweh omg I’m so sorry to hear about your Grandpa.
That’s so sad, especially since it was right before Christmas. That must have been really tough. My prayers and deepest sympathies go out to you and your family. 
Wow it sounds like your Grandpa went through way too much suffering during his life. He must have been a very strong person physically and emotionally to make it through several strokes.
I’ve never really had such a sad experience as you have. I can’t imagine what it would feel like if one of my loved ones didn’t even remember who I was anymore. That would definitely hurt a lot.
Although, I’m not as close with my grandparents since I only have my grandma from my mom’s side left, and she’s back in India, so it’s not like I get to see her. We’re planning to go visit this summer though.
God really does work in some mysterious ways. It would have been worse if you guys didn’t get the chance to attend the funeral, so I’m glad that you did. I bet your grandpa was a great man, and even though he went through a lot of rough times, he should take comfort in knowing that he lived a long and happy life thanks to the amazing family that he had.
May he R.I.P. <3